You really coming over, don't trick.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
