Soap is not a condiment
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
