i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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