I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
