I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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