I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
it glows. i had to have it.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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