This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
