I wanna bring you to show and tell
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
