He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
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