i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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