Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
