Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
