With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
