He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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