If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
