I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
