yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
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