Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
When are your genitals available?
Randomize
