no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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