Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
