Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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