Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Randomize
