You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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