dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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