Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
