Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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