Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
