you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
