Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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