It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
