My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
