my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I wanna passion pit in your ass
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
