she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Enjoy the penises
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize
