I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
