worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize