lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
