oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize
