so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
