I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
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