I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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