...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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