I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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