I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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