Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
