mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
