i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Your penis caused this!
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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