The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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