i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
