Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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