So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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