Too much gin, very little bucket
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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