I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Randomize